Random January February 2, 2010

Is it just me or did January pull a fast one and disappear before I got out of the starting blocks?  The gun went off and I was obviously still tying my shoelaces!  Since the kids started school I am trying to get into new routines and timetables that seem simple but I still have to cognitively process each day.  Hopefully by the end of this month I will be back on autopilot!  So here are some random things before I start ranting about politics and other boring nonsense!

• We have just had our house painted.  It was more stressful than I anticipated and every time they painted our window frames the fumes gave me a headache!  The workers only managed to break a toilet seat while being here for 3 weeks. 

 

• My Eldest started BIG school.  Hubby and I felt a little twinge as our Eldest donned his school uniform and went off dragging his school bag behind him.  After two weeks he can write his name and is starting to learn the alphabet.

 

• Disney is good for some things, since Eldest watched “Lazytown” he has a new found love for fruit referring to it as ’sports candy’!

 

• I moved Wee One to a new playgroup.  I want my kid to play outside, get dirty, stick macaroni on paper and eat play dough.  Last year he came home bearing photostated copies of things that my Eldest was doing at school.  Trying to teach a 2-year-old the cone, cylinder and cube shape seemed a little advanced! 

 

• Wee One has started his first swimming lessons.  I wonder if water phobia is genetic? (Can you tell it’s not going well?)

 

• I decided that this was going to my year where I would pick up my paintbrush, dust off my camera and give myself that important “me” time.   The “I am woman hear me roar” bravado has now been beaten into submission by the children’s extra mural activities, chaining me to the steering wheel of my car.  I will get there eventually.

 

• Ring the bells and let the heavenly choir rejoice!   I FINALLY have a tumble dryer! He arrived with a name,  ”Maxx 7″,  and apparently he is also ’sensitive’.  I can now provide clean, DRY clothes for the entire family regardless of rain, thunderstorm or painter!

 

Now, if you will excuse me, “Maxx 7″ has just beeped with my dry load of laundry that “Maxx 6″  washed for me this morning.  Pity there is no “Maxx” to do the ironing too!

Premature Celebration! January 2, 2010

It all starts with 3 couples who have been friends for many years.   The men started high school together and luckily when they found the ‘girls of their dreams’ they got along too!  We watched each couple start their romances, get engaged, partied at the engagement parties, stood and watched each one get married, partied harder at the reception and for a few years got together on a regular basis.

Then one by one we decided to fall pregnant, we drank tea at the baby showers, brought flowers to celebrate the arrival of the pink feet and watched each other fall into the motions of parenthood and sleep deprivation.  Slowly, as we added to our families, and strangely we all have two boys a piece, we try to see each other at birthday parties, which is just bedlam and plain impossible to have a conversation!

So it was arranged that after Christmas and  just before New Year we would get together for our last ‘adult’ dinner of the year.  Babysitters were arranged, the kids were bathed and fed on time so that nothing  could make us miss a second of our big night out!

It was good, really good! We ate amazing food, drank a little too much, laughed until we cried and were the last to leave the restaurant!

Needless to say, December 31st was looking like the 1st of January, but we couldn’t pull the duvet over our heads, Hubby had an early morning tee-off time with my Dad who celebrates his birthday on the last day of the year. (And woe betide anyone who gives him his birthday gift in left over Christmas wrapping paper!)  So the men went off to chase a little white ball around a golf course and I chased two little boys around my Mom’s garden and house.  By the afternoon ’shattered’ could not describe how dearly Hubby and I were paying for our sins from the night before.  After Dad’s birthday lunch, (which ended in the evening), we threw the kids in the car, raced home, dunked them in a bath, slapped on their pj’s and drop kicked each one into bed. 

Hubby and I knew our fate, that this year would be different, we had prematurely celebrated and the party spirit was gone.  We were tucked up in bed at 8:30 and I turned the lights out at 9:30 when I found my book on my face. 

At midnight, the sky was alight with fireworks, their whizzes, pops and bangs echoing through the night air.  Hubby and I turned to face each other, wished each other a Happy New Year and turned back over to catch up on the sleep lost due to the premature New Years Eve of 2009!

Ode to the Christmas Aftermath! December 27, 2009

 ’ Twas the Night Before Christmas’ by Clement Clarke Moore is one of favourite Christmas poems even though it has been overdone through the years.

Looking at the Christmas aftermath in my house which is  strewn wrapping paper, packaging, bottles stacked for recycling and a very neglected ironing pile, I was inspired in the spirit of this very special poem to write one pertaining to my household today.

‘ Twas two days AFTER Christmas and all through the house

Not a creature was stirring not even a mouse…

Although Luka the goldfish, was thankfully still,

Swimming around in his salad bowl.

  

 As it was raining outside, two boys were inside,

Leaving their skateboards at the front door.

 

 Hubby was lost behind a book, only surfacing now and then,

To the give the fridge a look.

 

 The woman of the house,

Who was Cook, Cleaner, Mother and Spouse,

Looked at the mess and thought to herself,

If only Santa had left her a *house elf!

(*I think J K Rowling must have thought about mothers everywhere when including these magical housekeeping folk in her Harry Potter books!)

A Tale Of Two Fairies December 18, 2009

The Advent Calender has been dutifully filled by our resident Christmas Fairy.  A concept I came up with as our Advent Calender has little pockets which can be filled with treats and then reused the following year.  This concept of “waiting” till the next day to have another treat is something Eldest didn’t wish to comprehend and so the Christmas Fairy comes every night to fill the following days pocket with a treat which is then eagerly discovered by the kids on waking every morning.  A little chocolate before breakfast never hurt anybody and afterall its Christmas!

My eldest son has had another wish, that the Tooth Fairy would visit for Christmas.  I scoffed at this little fantasy, afterall in my mind five and a half is far too young to start losing teeth!  How wrong I was!  Monday morning, while Eldest was munching on his piece of toast he exclaimed that he had a “wobbly tooth”!   Once again I endeared the little chap and tapped his front tooth telling him again that it was still not budging! 

“Not that one Mommy!  This one!”

Tapping one of his lower incisors I realised that my ‘baby’did indeed have a wobbly tooth, probably the first little nipper he cut when we were in the UK for Christmas five and a half years ago!  In all honesty I was not prepared to ‘grow up’ this quickly! 

Everybody he met or spoke to was told of his ‘wobbly tooth’ and everyday he insisted on eating an apple in an attempt to dislodge the long-awaited wobbly tooth!  Whether it was the apples or the hotdog he ate for lunch, by yesterday evening my first-born had achieved his next milestone.  His first tooth fell out!  After much deliberation a shoe was selected for the prized tooth to await the arrival of the Tooth Fairy. 

 As he went to bed that night I assumed the role of the Christmas Fairy by placing two chocolate Reindeer in the Advent Calender and tiptoed upstairs to be the Tooth Fairy for my little boy who is growing up whether his mother likes it or not.

Vanishing Lebkuchen! December 14, 2009

Our beloved Aunt in Germany has stopped coming to South Africa for Christmas.  She prefers to soak up the Christmas cheer with her friends at the many Christmas Markets and then escape the wet weather of January through to April by soaking up the much-needed sun here in South Africa.  I can’t blame her!  However, we have experienced a huge loss due to this decision. Lebkuchen, Stollen and Cinnamon Stars! 

Nothing made it feel more like Christmas than getting together on a Sunday for “Advent Coffee” and gorging on  pieces of Stollen, (German Christmas Cake), Lebkuchen, (a type of spiced cake, sometimes coated in chocolate) and Zimt Sterne, (Cinnamon Stars).  Thankfully, due to a more global economy, some stores here in South Africa started stocking various of these items imported from Germany.  Hooray, we could eat Lebkuchen for another year!  Last year my hopes were dashed when I found that many stores decided that South Africans would stick to the humble Christmas mince-pie and didn’t bring in any of my favourite German delicacies.  Luckily for me, Hubby did a visit to Germany, and at my request, came back with the much awaited mother load of Lebkuchen and Zimt Sterne!  So we celebrated another year the ‘normal’ way.

This year I went on another scavenger hunt on the quest to find Lebkuchen, which I found, although the price could suck the Christmas cheer out of anybody!  So I bought my stash and packed it away in the grocery cupboard awaiting our first Advent with my Father-In-Law.  Coffee was made and my stash of Lebkuchen and Stollen were enjoyed.  I didn’t put it all out, there are four Sundays till Christmas and I was determined to have a bit every Sunday!

The box was considerably lighter this  Sunday…  I was  horrified!  What happened to my stash!

Devastated, I informed Hubby that we were a few Lebkuchen short of  an “Advent Coffee” when he, looking most forlorn, exclaimed “Oh no! I was enjoying my lebkuchen in the mornings, don’t we have any more?”

So while we were all tucked up in bed with “visions sugar plums dancing in our heads” Hubby was starting his day with a morning mug of java and a Lebkuchen or two! 

My New Years Resolution…. learn to bake!

Left Behind December 1, 2009

Today is another World  AIDS Day.  A day to remember those who fought the disease and those who are still fighting it.  A day to bring about AIDS awareness in the hope that this virus can be stopped in its tracks.

Today I want to remember the children, particularly in the rural areas, who have lost their parents to HIV/AIDS.  Many, becoming the primary caregiver to the ill parent and nursing them in their final days.  Many, orphaned by HIV/AIDS who are then left to become the head of the house and the parent figure to their younger siblings.  Children, who due to HIV/AIDS,  have had a fast forward button pushed on their little lives forcing them to grow up before their time and taking on the responsibilities of an adult.

Tabelo Timse has written an article called “SA’s Aids time bomb” on News 24.com.   This report states, that due to South Africa’s delayed response to HIV/AIDS, it is estimated that by 2015,  32% of South Africa’s children will have lost one or both parents to the disease. 

These are children who were failed by their government while their parents were alive and I question what type of support their government will give them when they are left to fend for themselves.

It’s easy to play the blame game, but today, I want to remember these children who have been left behind.

His Name Is Luka And He Lives In a Salad Bowl! November 22, 2009

It’s the end of the year, and quite honestly I am tired of kiddies birthday parties!  My humblest apologies to all those who are born in the last few months of the year but my enthusiasm, and there was very little to begin with, has waned!

Eldest is still at the age where moms are required to attend these birthday parties. The worst party time for me is the Friday afternoon!  This is when Wee One generally needs his afternoon nap and taking an overstimulated 2-year-old to a party is a nightmare!  While I run around, trying to stop him from climbing to the top of the jumping castle or shoving more than one sweet in his mouth, the other mothers sit in their little groups, sipping tea and complimenting the hostess on her fabulous cake.   I constantly clock watch, waiting for each half hour to pass so that I can smile at the mothers, say goodbye and make sure my child thanks the hostess for the lovely party.   By the end of the two-hour party, I generally leave dragging one child behind me and holding  the youngest in a vice like grip, looking like I had the party of my life! 

When that time arrived on Friday I gathered up my troops and sent  Eldest off to do the ‘polite routine’ by thanking the party mom.

These days something called a ‘party pack’ has been accepted as normal party etiquette, although I totally disagree with this practice.  Each child is given a bag or box of goodies on departure to continue the gorge fest when they get home, much to the joy of the mother who already has her offspring buzzing on a sugar high.  So you can imagine my joy when he emerged with his ‘loot box’ of chocolates and sweets!  Imagine my horror when it was accompanied by a clear plastic bag filled with water and a goldfish swimming around in it!!!

I kid you not!  Each child was sent home with a real live goldfish!  My son was overjoyed!  If I’d known that we would be receiving this parting gift I would have made a quick and impolite exit down the road!

My son has named him Luka and as I was totally unprepared for the new addition to our family, my salad bowl has had to suffice as our gold fellow’s first home.

A Symbolic Handful Of Sand November 18, 2009

It was Christmas Eve, 2002 and we were sitting on the veranda of my father-in-laws home, wet from a late evening dip in the pool, trying to cool down from the heat of the KwaZulu-Natal summer.  We had nuts, marzipan and lebkuchen to snack on while the candles of advent were flickering in the fading light. I remember that the conversation was centered around Christmas and it’s traditions when Hubby’s grandfather, who at this stage was in his late 80’s, looked out into the distance and  said ” I always used to love the Christmas time but it never felt like Christmas again after I left Memel.”  I couldn’t quite comprehend at the time the gravity of his statement.

During July this year my father-in-law and his sister embarked on a tour of the old East Prussia.  A country which no longer exists.  Strange thought that.  Memelland is now part of Lithuania and known as Klaepaedia.  In the time of my husband’s grandparents it was a thriving harbour town and although its governance seemed to switch between that of Germany and Lithuania,  it had its own monetary system, its people spoke German with a different dialect and used words that were considered “old prussian”.  During the war the Prussians fled their homes due to the invading Russian Army who assisted the allied forces in World War 2.  My husband’s grandfather came from a family of seven children and he never heard or saw them again after the war.  He heard that his father had died of malnutrition as he was too old to flee.  It was a miracle that my husband’s grandmother, aunt and father survived the 3 months on foot to reach the only place where they felt they would be accepted, into war-torn Germany.  What was left of their memories of Memel and Prussia were a few photographs and the stories that were told around the table on a rare occasion, like it was on this particular Christmas Eve.  I think it was too painful for them to relive their memories of Memel, of what and who they lost during the war.

My father-in-law and his sister returned to the places they had been told about, although they were born there, they left too young, with no memory of their birth country.  They walked along the shoreline of Nidden where their parents would sunbathe in their youth , they were shown original buildings that had not been destroyed and monuments that have been erected to remember the people of East Prussia and those who died trying to flee its borders. 

While looking at the many photo’s of this tour, that had taken them back to their roots, I realised what my husband’s grandfather was trying to say all those years ago.  I realised that he had lost his home and culture, even though they lived in Germany and eventually South Africa, part of his heart lived on in Memelland. A place he was forced to leave and could never reach again as it fell behind the iron curtain.  When it was finally lifted he was too old to go back and make his peace.  His children have gone, they have tried to piece together the names of places to the stories they were told, taken photo’s of the churches they were baptised in and tried to connect with what made them Prussian. 

Amongst the gifts of German chocolates, spaetzle and toys for my boys, was a small bag of sand.  They couldn’t take their parents back to Memel but they brought some of Memel back to South Africa and although it is only symbolic, we will scatter the earth on their graves, it’s the best we can do.

Can We “CTRL ALT DEL” August Please? September 1, 2009

Helloooo!!!  Anybody still there??? 

Here on the East Coast we could not have asked for a better day to welcome Spring, there was a slight touch of the humidity that drains many of us of our energies in the summer months and for the first time in weeks we could sit outside under the setting sun and watch our two boys run around in the garden.  With the promise of summer on the horizon and the heady scent of jasmine floating in through my windows I am finally in the right space to blow the dust off my keyboard!

I do have good reasons for being scarce, to be quite honest we could just ‘ctrl alt del ‘ August right off my annual calender!  Ever heard of the “Butterfly Effect”?  Well I attribute the chain of events that befell my lot squarely on the shoulders of Hubby!  From the moment he attempted the 90 degree drop  ramp into the bowlrider (which looks like a big empty swimming pool) at the local skateboard park and crack fractured his elbow my title of Domestic Goddess has been seriously tested by the men in my home!

As I just started getting used to my new job function, that of chauffeuring Hubby to work and back, I had to try and be the plumber/washing machine expert as well!  Please lets forgive our brothers who take on this ungodly task of bending under counters to turn in pipes etc, the plumbers crack is truly difficult to cover up, I’ve been there and will hold back my snigger’s from now on!  Bring on the one piece overalls!  Despite my best efforts and that of “Danny”, resident expert in washing machine repairs, my poor little washing machine could wash, rinse and spin no longer.  With jarring financial pain we had to replace him with a younger model who sounds like a jet plane during the spin cycle and beeps when the wash is finished, he even came with a name - “Maxx” which is printed in bright red on the front!

Finally life looked like it was going to move to a more normal biorhythm, as Hubby prepared to drive himself once more to and from work, (after four weeks), Eldest woke up with a temp and a dry cough.  Just as I resigned being a chauffeur I had to sign up and be Florence Nightingale.  For 3 days I took temperatures, ensured an increase in liquid intake and monitored for any signs of the dreaded ’swine flu’.  By Friday evening my Eldest was the picture of good health, well almost if one ignored the barking cough, and I prepared the children for bed, looking forward to night of relaxed sleep.  Hubby handed Wee One to me straight from his bath, he felt about as hot as cookies fresh from the oven!  Taking his temperature I looked in horror as it beeped 38.6! 

Saturday morning he woke up with a temperature of 39.6 and I knew that a relaxing weekend was shot to hell.  Eldest had passed his throat infection to his brother and on a weekend when Doctors go to their holiday homes next to trout dams up in the mountains and turn their phones to voice mail!!!   Lets just say that when Wee One finally turned a corner on Tuesday I felt like I had been dragged behind a car.  I had less than 3 hours sleep in 3 days, Wee One insisted on lying on my chest and he is not a petite build, my whole body ached!  By the end of the week he appeared to be on the up, just in time for my moms birthday weekend!  The boys seemed well and I sat  that Sunday breathing a sigh of relief …

That night Wee One was restless and Eldest started his croupy cough again.  Monday could not have been bluer, Eldest’s temperature had returned like a phoenix and Wee One’s ears had become inflamed as a secondary infection due to his prior throat infection.  Even Hubby looked sorry for me when he went off to work.  So back to the Doc we went and the ‘road to health’ started again. By Wednesday I kicked Eldest off to school and Friday Wee One followed suit.  “Why send a child to school for only one day?” you may ask. 

My sons decided to ‘thank’ me for all my nose wiping efforts and gave me the viral love which had dominated my life for nearly 3 weeks!!!  Mom deserved a morning to curl up under the duvet and feel sorry for herself! 

I hung my “Supermom” uniform behind the bathroom door, put on my dressing gown and grabbed a box of tissues, the ironing would have to wait…

Home James! Or Is It Jane? July 14, 2009

Hubby, against my wishes, bought our Eldest son his first skateboard at the age of 3 years old.  He came into the house with the glow of a father who had just given the ‘ultimate’ gift to his son.  I must admit that all the fancy toys I have bought, for their educational purposes, toys that were requested on Christmas and Birthday lists, all get played with seldom but a request to go outside to have “a little skate, just a little one Mom”, is a daily occurrence and the thrill has obviously not worn off.

Over the last few months Hubby has been taking Eldest to a a local skateboard park, not that much skateboarding gets done due to our child being as young as he is, but he loves to watch the more experienced skaters.  It was at about this time a few mutterings were made by Hubby that he would like his own skateboard so that he could skate with Eldest instead of standing around doing nothing. 

The surf and skate shops around our area have had blowout sales and it was on one of my ‘hunter gather’ expeditions that I found some skateboards that were discounted! As Hubby’s birthday was in a few months time I decided to buy him the skateboard he was obviously going to buy himself.  That evening he turned the board in his hands and a boyish glint could be seen in his eyes.  I had the glow of a wife who had finally presented her Hubby with an ultimate gift!  He was desperate to get out there and skate, even taking his board out in the empty parking lot at work for a secret session!

Last week Sunday we finally revealed to Eldest that his Dad has his own board and would finally be joining him on the ramps!  Not wanting to interrupt the Father and Son bonding moment I left them to it and took Wee One for a little stroll.  When I returned I found Hubby standing, watching Eldest skate and doing nothing!  As I approached I was met with a grimace of pain clearly displayed on Hubby’s face. 

 

“I came so left and fell on my arm.  I am sure it’s just muscular because I can move it!”

 

Mmm.  As the afternoon wore on Hubby’s pain increased and he got paler by the hour.  There was only one thing for it – Emergency Room.

He returned with his arm in a sling and was told that the x-rays would still be reviewed but nothing was obviously broken.  What a relief!  However he still could not put any pressure on the arm and I had a new title to add to my long list of  job descriptions, that of chauffeur!   Yesterday we learnt that there is a fracture and that Hubby needs to keep his arm in a sling for the next three weeks!  So for three weeks I will be doing Hubby’s work run and the kids school run.

On the drive home I heard the following conversation take place between father and son.

 

“Dad, I’m so sad you hurt your arm.”  sympathised Eldest.

 

“Don’t worry boy, it won’t be long and it will be fine.” reassured Hubby.

 

“But Dad, are you not going to skateboard with me anymore?”

 

“Of course I will!  Once my arm is okay we will go skateboarding again.”

 

“Thanks Dad, thanks.”

 

As I turned into our driveway I could only sigh and wonder what lay ahead of me and my extream sportsmen!